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Racist Jokes

imagine dragons
Do you like imagine dragons?

If they answer yes say:
Imagine me draggin my nuts across your face
bbq joke
You going to that bbq on Friday.

If they answer what bbq u say: its the one where I smack my meat across your grill.
funny comeback for someone trying to tell a joke you heard
I thought of a comeback u can say to someone trying to talk shit and say jokes u already heard.

Tell them that joke is so old like the crust in your underwear.
What does fubu really stand for?

answer: farmers use to buy us.
What does Pontiac really stand for.

Answer: poor old nigger thinks its a Cadillac
How do you keep black youth off the streets?

Answer: put a KFC on the sidewalk
tootsie roll1
Milk,milk lemonade around the corner fudge is made stick ya finger in ya hole now you got a tootsie roll.
More racist jokes down here...
black people10
What do you call black people jumping off a church ? HOLY SHIT
the wall
What has more brains than a group of Jewish scientists?
The wall behind them
the jewish date
How do you get a Jewish girl's number?

Ask her to role up her sleeve
jewpiter 1
they should call Jupiter JEWPITER because its a gas planet
how a nigger gets its color!
MOM:oh honey were you just rolling around in the mud?

SON:mom i just came out of your vagina so i was born like this.

MOM:oh yeah i think god on accedently burnt u good luck next time.
Q:how do you keep 10 niggers from rapping a white girl.
A: throw them a basketball
why cant niggers go to heaven
Because if there are niggers, it isn't heaven any more.
more yo mama jokes
upvote my jokes and I'll upload more

Yo momma is so short, you can see her feet on her driver's license.

Yo momma is so fat, when she sat on the back of the bus it did a wheelie.

Yo momma's so smelly, that when she spread her legs, I got seasick.

Yo momma is so fat when she sat on an iPad she made a plasma TV.

Yo momma is so poor that when I asked her whats for dinner tonight she lit her pocket on fire and said, "hot pocket."

Yo momma's so fat, her baby pictures were taken by satellite.

Yo momma is so stupid that when thieves broke in and stole the tv, she ran outside and yelled to them,"Hey, you forgot the remote!"

Your momma is so hairy when she opens her legs it says "Welcome to Busch Gardens."

Yo Momma's teeth are so yellow, that when she smiles, traffic slows down!

Yo momma's so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday!
How do you pick up a Jewish girl??

With a shovel.
How do you tell if a guy's Jewish??

If his nose is longer than his dick.
cheese please
a white man walks in a bar he sat next to a black dude the black man asked for some cheese the bartender said why black dude said for my cracker
last request
A husband and wife have four sons. The oldest three are tall with red hair and light skin while the youngest son is short with black hair and dark eyes.
The father was on his deathbed when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, before I die, be totally honest with me: Is our youngest son my child?"
The wife replied, "I swear on everything that's holy that he is your son."
With that, the husband passed away. The wife muttered, "Thank God he didn't ask about the other three."
favorite song
The inmate on death row is scheduled to be put to death by firing squad. He doesn't request a last meal or anything special for his last day.

As he stands before the firing squad he says, "Actually, music is my life. One thing I would really like would be to sing my favorite song, one whole time through, with no interruptions."

The guard nods solemnly and tells him to go ahead.

The inmate starts, "One billion bottles of beer on the wall..."
one too many jokes
Q: What is black and blue and brown, and lies in a ditch?
A: A brunette who has told too many blonde jokes.
mitch hedbergs funniest jokes
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.

An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.

I'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life.

All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me.

I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.

Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain't funny!

I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle.

I bought a seven-dollar pen because I always lose pens and I got sick of not caring.

You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don't want to eat the fish, they just want to make it late for something.

People teach their dogs to sit; it's a trick. I've been sitting my whole life, and a dog has never looked at me as though he thought I was tricky.

Dogs are forever in the push up postion.

My belt holds my pants up, but the belt loops hold my belt up. I don't really know what's happening down there. Who is the real hero?

Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.

The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.

I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.

I like refried beans. That's why I wanna try fried beans, because maybe they're just as good and we're just wasting time. You don't have to fry them again after all.

It's very dangerous to wave to people you don't know because what if they don't have hands? They'll think you're cocky.

My sister wanted to be an actress, but she never made it. She does live in a trailer. She got halfway. She's an actress, she just never gets called to the set.

I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it.

If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be messed-up.

I'd like to get four people who do cart wheels very good, and make a cart.

I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.

I saw a human pyramid once. It was very unnecessary.
how to be a true nigger
racist jokes - how to be a true nigger
1) Lie about how big your dick is all the time, and about how many white women you fucked while their husbands were away at work. This way, you feel wanted by someone other than law enforcement.

2) Bounce as much as you can, bobble your head up & down and back & forth, and hold your crotch when you walk. Don't forget to lick your lips as much as possible.

3) Wear the largest clothes you can find. Wear you cap backwards or sideways. Wear a bandana underneath the cap if possible.

4) Screw as many fat negro sows as you can, this way Your illegitimate children help the mothers bleed the government dry, and you can lie to yourself about what a "playa you is".

5) Only drink malt liquor, Colt 45, or Thunderbird.

6)When you get pulled over and arrested for the trunkful of weed in your Sedan deVille, yell racism and racial profiling (even if the cop is black, he's an oreo). Make sure the Nation of Islam and the NAACP hear about your case. Don't forget the ACLU.

7) All negresses will allow their heathen children to run wild in stores and break things. When they want you to pay for the items, tell them, "you just want me to pay for that shit cuz I'm black. You'd let me go if I was white, muthafucka."

8) All negresses will converse with the black check-out clerks at the grocery store and hold up the line, especially when there's a lot of white folks behind you. Act like you can't find your money and hold up the line even further.

9) Talk about how much you hate white people with your buddies when soliciting downtown street corners, then lose all focus and hose your shorts when watching all the fine, white businesswomen walking past.

10) It doesn't matter how shitty your car is, put the biggest diameter rims on you can find, and the most expensive stereo system. Ride around in white neighborhoods at night and play rap music as loud as you can. We love the rattling trunk, we really, really do.

11) When you are at a street intersection when trying to find parking at you favorite black club, make sure you and your fellow negroes gridlock the intersection. We aren't really in a hurry to get anywhere, really we're not.

12) When going on a drive-by shooting always miss the target and hit an innocent bystander. Children are a plus.

13) Make the most annoying sounds when you laugh. Example: "KSSS SSSS SSSS SSSS!!" Scream out loud when beginning your laugh, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH, KSSSS SSSS SSSSS SSSS!!"

14) Talk as loud as you can whenever you can. Especially in libraries or theaters. Black women, this is a perfect time for you to chimp out on your "boo". Remember, white folks invented home video just because of you.

15) Black women, when going to the theater, wear the highest weave you can, and sit in front of some white people. Oh, this is the perfect time to call your homegirl if you can get reception to your cellphone.

16) When at fast-food resturaunts, hog up the front counter and take your time looking at the menu if you see white people behind you. Then, when giving your order, keep changing it around. If you work at a fast food place, take an excessively long time to get the order ready, especially for white people.

17) When at a check-out counter of any kind, try to bargain with the clerk on the price. If you can't lower the price, grab it and run.

18) Walk slow and purposely push and shove, then look at those people with disdain and smack your lips a lot.

19) When begging for money, act offended at white folks who only give you a dime or a "solid quattah" instead of a five dollar bill. This is a reasonable means to attack or mug them. When you get caught, state your reason as "dey wuz white." The media and the ACLU will come to your rescue, so don't sweat it.

20) Always whine about how the white man is keeping you down, and how you are owed slave reparations. Even though you've never been a slave and could never survive it because you're lazy.

21) Wear a lot of fake gold around your neck and fingers. Go to the dentist and get those rotten teeth replaced with gold implants. Go ahead, you know you're going to stiff the dentist. If he keeps harrassing you about the bill, call the NAACP.

22) Always talk on your cellphone when driving. Ignore red lights, ambulances, and fire trucks. If you hit someone, drive off.

23) Say stupid things like "YEEAAAAAAHHHHHH, BOOOOOOYYYYYYYYY!!!!" or "BEEEEYYYYOOOOOOTTCHHH!!!!!" Use ebonics so you don't have to sound intelligent like white folks.

24) Call the founding fathers racist slave owners so that public schools with names like 'George Washington High' or 'Thomas Jefferson High' are changed. Don't stop whining until every public school in America is named the following: 'Malcolm X High', 'Rosa Parks Middle School', 'Rodney King Elementary' and so on.

25) Burn down your own churches and cry racism. This way you can demand that the government build you a new church at taxpayers' expense, and they'll do it.

26) Spread sexually transmitted diseases (to white girls if possible) and obsessively use drugs.

27) Put your hand over your mouth and do your "human beat box" in public places so you can annoy the fuck out of everyone.


28) Use "muthafucka" a lot when speaking, end everything with "knowwhumsain?". In certain instances, you may end sentences with "...n' shit". Knowwhumsain?

29) When the police officer hands you a ticket, tell him it's because you're black. It had absolutely nothing to do with you running the red light moments before.

30) Park you car on a college campus and vandalize it. Be sure to spray swastikas and vulgarities on the car, then tell the police you are the victim of a hate crime. Even if you are not an instructor or a student, you'll still be able to sue the school. They'll cave in because you're black.

31) Stop in the middle of the street and get out of your car when you see a homeboy of yours sitting on a curb, leave the door open and walk over and talk to your "homie". Ignore the other drivers honking their horns, they're probably just white folks anyway.

32) ALWAYS walk down the middle of the street. Never move for any oncoming vehicles. When they honk, just give them a scowl and smack your lips a lot.

33) When in a grocery store or any other store, always block the isles, especially for white people. Never move your shopping cart, and never tell your heathen children to move out of the way. Whenever possible, act like you don't see the person trying to get past.

34) Negroes are very sexual (not in a good way). Fuck anyone or anything.... men, women, children, dogs..... if it has at least one hole, anything goes. Anything to get your freak on.

35) When your girlfriend turns you in for roasting her 2 year old son in the oven, tell the police the truth.... he broke your Playstation 2. Don't worry, it should work.... you're black, after all.

36) Black women MUST have at least five kids by at least three different negroes by the age of 21, or you aren't "keepin it real".

37) Black women do not need babysitters. Tuck your eight children into bed, go out to the clubs and get drunk and "freaked" by five or six negroes. When you return home at 8:45AM, you'll find that someone ratted you out to Child Protective Services. Blame it on your skin and say, "dey tryin' to take my kids cuz I black, dawg!!"

38) Hang around gas stations and beg white people for money. Intimidation is PLAN B if they refuse. Or, cry RACISM when they kick your ass.

39)Black check-out clerks must NEVER be polite or courteous to white customers, for ANY reason. Overcharge them and keep the change, and NEVER thank them as they're leaving, only give them a dirty look.

40) Blacks should strive for at least one prison term, so you can get your proper respect from your peers. They will think you are ignorant if you try to go to college, and will think less of you. They'll call you an "oreo".

41) To the negro, raping a white woman is the same as if she asked him to fuck her. Go tell your friends what a "playa you is".

42) When watching a black movie at the theater, it's okay to pull your pistol out and "bust caps" if you like the movie. If you aren't a suspect being led away, remind the media that they wouldn't be airing this incident if it were white people watching an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie. Make sure the cameras are rolling when you say it.

43) Always beg your family and friends for money, and always eat their food. Never pay them back or be there for them in their time of need.

44) If you somehow become rich, do NOT buy that Hummer or Mercedes Benz. No, no! Rule #1, get a white girl!! Find yourself a white girl with enough low self-esteem to be seen with a negro. Always have a white woman, no matter what she looks like.

45) To the rappers, always steal white musicians' music and integrate it into your mindless rap songs. They are too busy praising you to sue you.

46) Rappers should always remind people of how many times they've been shot and lived to tell about it (like we didn't notice them on our TV screens). This way, everyone will respect you even more. Remind everyone that rap music is "the only way out" of the 'hood and crime, as if you weren't still stealing cars, money, or drugs.

47) When cellmates ask you why you're locked up in prison, always say, "the white man put me up in here, he keepin' me down."

48) Always give white people that "hard" stare... squint your eyes and flex your lips. Breathe fast and hard, clench your fists when staring.

49) When you're being taped on COPS, always say, "whatchoo restin me fo, I ain't did nuffin!!" A liberal attourney will see you and come to your aid. Don't worry, the ACLU will pay for it.

50) Always sit as low as you can when driving. If your friends are following, make sure you all drive alongside each other so you can take up all the lanes. Drive under the minimum speed limit.

51) Lick your lips and rub your chin a lot in public places, so we know what a "playa" you really are. Make sure a lot of white girls see you doing this.

52) For no reason at all, blurt out "KEEPIN IT REEEEAAAALLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!" and "HHHHEEEEEYYYYYYLLLLLLLLLYYYEEEEAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!" You sound ignorant, but hey, they accept negroes these days.

53)Make up retarded names like ICE-T, ICE CUBE, Notorious B.I.G., and Tupac (Tupunk) to call yourselves. As if Tyrell, LeShawn, and Shenanae weren't retarded enough.

54) Take ebonics one step further and make up completely new words. Example: "Fo' shizzle" or "dat's da shizznit!!"

55) Most negroes should die violently by age 30 if they wish to have a legacy. Black women will grow old and teach their niglets lies about white people so they can carry on their practice of whining and recieving handouts, and so they can justify black-on-white crime.

56) Black pedestrians should cross intersections when the crossing sign clearly says WAIT. Walk slowly so you can hold up traffic.

57) Black mothers, you will undoubtedly lose a son or two (or all eight), as a result of being gunned down by a police officer during a struggle over the officer's gun. Chimp out in front of the cameras, lie about how your "baby" was a hardworking, loving, caring son.... even though his rap sheet was long enough to wallpaper the complete interior of your project dwelling, and no matter how many times he beat even your ass on certain occasions.

58) It is perfectly acceptable to gun down your best friend in a dispute over a crack whore, a piece of chicken, or even a quarter or dime. The more insignificant the item, the more justified it was to shoot him.

59) Watch only BET, MTV, or UPN. WB is not completely overrun by negroes yet, so it is not yet appropriate for viewing.

60) When two negroes are ready to fight each other, they should circle each other for approximately half an hour and tell each other how they are going to hurt each other. "We gonna strap, dawg!" or "do sumfin', muhfugga!"

61) Speaking of fights, never attack a white person in packs of less than five. Even women, since you'll need at least one nigger to hold each limb while one is raping her.

62) When black women chimp out, they should talk extremely loud and fast using excessive vulgarities, point a lot, and move their heads side to side and in a circular motion. Spitting while screaming is a plus.

63) Overexaggerate body language when speaking. The more you exaggerate, the more important you will feel.

64) Black women should greet all people like this: "HHHHEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!" This excludes white people. When greeting them, give them a dirty look and smack your lips.

65) When being interrogated by the police for your crime, blame it on your lack of a father for a role model.... even though you supposedly know this is the reason why, and you commited crime anyway. Chances are, your father would've led you down the same road anyway.

66) Always struggle with the police during your arrest. This way you'll get your 15 minutes of fame on COPS or AMERICA's MOST WANTED.

67) The more a woman weighs, the sexier she is, black or white. 300lbs+ is what you should be looking for.

68)Black women should chew gum like a cow grazing on grass, smack a lot when you chew.

69) Smoke only menthol cigarettes.

70) Drink yourself into a drunken stupor and then beat your woman into a bloody pulp. Tell her "I'm sorry" and she will drop charges.

71) Have a separate "downlow" relationship with a black male, then go home to your baby's momma and transmit your newly aquired HIV virus to her.

72) Black singers (especially rappers) should promote crime and other thuggish activities in their music.

73) Black musicians should also promote the murder of white men and the raping of their women in their music. Whites will be charged with hate crimes if they do this, but for you, it's freedom of expression.

74) At work, sit around all day or hide in the restroom during your shift, then collect your check at the end of the week and complain that you should get more because you are the hardest working employee.

75) Upon release from prison, you should have read the Koran and be a devout Muslim. This further justifies your hate for the "white devil" and now leaves the door open for you to become an activist. This will allow you to publicly criticize the white man for your shortcomings and exempts you from hate crime legislation. Take a page out of Jesse Jackson's book and shakedown large corporations for money, threatening a discrimination lawsuit if they don't pay up.

76) A FUBU jumpsuit with a lot of fake gold around your neck and fingers is the equivalent of a white man in an Italian suit wearing a Rolex watch.

77) A negro, for the most part, either has a shitty car and a nice "crib" or a shitty home with a "pimp ride", never both. All finances are poured into one or the other.

78) The more sex partners a black woman has, the higher status she has with the negro.

79) For all the talk of black women hating white women (as like with the males), they should still try and look like them. Dress like they do, try and talk like they do, and process the kinks and knapps out of your hair and dye it blonde. Bleach your skin if you are excessively dark.
80) Use an excessive amount of cologne or perfume to hide your foul odor. Though the cologne stinks, it is an improvement over your funk.
81) When failing an IQ test for a promotion or a job application, sue the employer. They will cave in because you're black, and from pressure from the NAACP.

82) Incidentally, when failing any military IQ test and you are put on the front lines in war, claim that the white men want to kill you because you're black.

83) Claim everything to your credit: Greek and Egyptian civilizations, inventions, and even claim that America was built on the backs of negroes.

84) Claim that whites put drugs in black neighborhoods to keep negroes down, or kill them, even though you chose to use those drugs if it WERE true.

85) Black politicians must NEVER speak of relevant issues. Instead, the main focus should be expanding affirmitive action, the need for slavery reparations, more hate crime legislation aimed against the white man, and the troubling fact that hurricanes are not given black names...."Hurricane Shenanae".

86) Blame white governments for creating hurricanes, tornadoes, and tsunamis in an attempt to kill blacks and other colored peoples.

87) As witnessed in New Orleans, negroes should ignore warnings to evacuate cities due to incoming natural disasters. When stranded, blame the president and white rescue teams for being racist and abandoning them, even though they were warned they could be on their own for an unknown period of time. Negroes should always wait for the government to do everything for them.

88) Keep up the claim that white women prefer negroes over white men, even though negroes will be the only ones to believe it. If you repeat the lie long enough, perhaps one day it will become the truth.

89) When police arrest someone in your neighborhoods, cry police brutality even though police are trying to subdue a doped-up negroe. When police stay out of your neighborhoods due to the high number of brutality complaints, cry racism and say the city government does not care about blacks.

90) Black mayors should always leave office with the city in or near bankruptcy. He should then boast about what a great job he did when indicted for corruption charges.

91) When black mayors fail their cities in emergencies such as natural catastrophies, always blame state or federal officials. Never blame yourself or other negroe city officials.

92) Black evangelists should become involved in race-related scams to sue police departments or the city (example: Al Sharpton in the Tawana Brawley case). They should also incite riots and then blame white people.

93) Black reverends should preach about doing the Lord's work, then preach about how evil the white man is. He should also attempt to have sex with every negress in the congregation, married or not.

94) Black muslims should claim that white governments attack their own countries to blame muslims or minorities for terrorism, such as the claim that whites flew the jets into the twin towers on 9/11 by remote control. And more recently, the claim that whites blew up the New Orleans levees to drown the negroes. It is absurd, but the negro will believe it.

95) Black movies should have stupid names such as "How Stella Got Her Groove Back", "Love Jones", and "Hustle and Flow".

96) When a black convict is scheduled for execution on a certain day, stage mass protests outside the prison. Do not take into account the victims' families, most or all are white, anyway. These protests should be attended by Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, Danny Glover, the NAACP, the Black Panthers, Louis Farrahkan and the Nation of Islam, and wiggers. Degenerate and violent behavior is accepted in this peaceful protest. Claim that the convict is a victim of the white justice system.

97) Any blacks who were evacuated from their cities for any emergency should never be thankful. If you get a sandwich or MREs, complain that they are cold. If you get a cot to sleep on, complain that it is not a waterbed. Negroes should trash and vandalize the hotels and facilities they are staying in, and should attempt to rape or rob any volunteers or residents of that city.

98) Negroes should constantly whine about being held back and being poor, even though they have multiple gold teeth, a cellphone and jewlery, and are wearing FUBU or FILA jumpsuits and three hundred dollar sneakers. Claim that the white man has you "locked up in the ghetto".

99) Negroes should justify looting by saying they were hungry and looking for food, even though you cannot eat a 40" television set.

100) Claim that the AIDS virus was developed in the white man's laboratories, engineered to wipe out the negro race..... even while knowing that the negro in Africa created it through his "special affection" for the African green monkey.

101) In racially mixed neighborhoods (black & white), negroes should vandalize their homes and paint racial slurs on it. For added effect, they should burn their front yards and throw charred wood on top of the area to add the effect of a cross burning. Blame the whites and say they want to drive you out of the neighborhoods and cry in front of the news cameras, "OOOOOOOOOOOOHH, LAWD!!! Look what dey done did to mah home!!!".

102) Negresses should kill their children, then blame the govenment for failing them and all blacks by not giving them enough welfare funds to properly care for the children. Lie about a medical condition, if possible.

103) The dumbest of the negro women speak far worse than any of your typical negroes, and can make one word sound like two. For instance, when a negro is accused of a crime, he may say, "I didn't do nothin'". The dumb negress would would say "Ah dih-in't do nuh-in!!" and smack her lips a lot.

104) Mispronounce words. Example: worse=(more) worser, worst=worsest, Buick=Byrrick (stress the "r").

105) When in agreement with someone, a negress should respond "oooooooooohh, chile, ain' dat da troof!" or "mmmmmmmmm-hmmmmmmmmm! Ah'm sayin'!".

106) When the male negro is in agreement with someone, he should reply "true dat, mah nigga" or "right on, bruh".

107) Protest for years to enact affirmitive action, political correctness, and to further hate crime legislation to outlaw anyone from calling you a nigger. Then, turn around and call each other niggers.

108) Every negro should have an alternate "street name" to go by, such as "Cornbread" or "T-Bone".

109) Negroes should kill each other in gang wars over their "turf", actually owned by some old rich Jew.

110) When your negro child shits in the wrong place during potty training, beat him to death or into a coma.

111) Never replace a burnt out headlight on your vehicle, just drive around with your brights on and blind everyone. Justify it by saying they should be able to hear you coming anyway from the bass out of the speakers.

112) Justify all crimes you've commited by blaming white people for holding you back, that they wouldn't let you earn an honest living or live a decent life (as if you really tried).

113) When they get your order wrong at the drive through, argue with the manager that you should get your money back AND keep the food. When you do not get your way, wait for the manager to leave work and try to run her over.

114) When you hit someone crossing the street, drive home with him sticking halfway out of your windshield, and later tell the police you didn't know what to do.... like call them in the first place.

115) Negroes should always be loud in public places, and always try to cut in line at movie theaters, convenience stores, and resturaunts and then pick a fight with someone when they say something. When the manager has to kick you out of the store, spit at him.

116) For teenage negresses who are afraid of telling their mothers they are pregnant (some are actually too stupid to tell or in denial), have the child and then abandon it in a trash dumpster, or sell him for a bag of crack cocaine.

17. Celebrate your false heroes such as Martin Luther King, Jr., and show a false sense of unity with your fellow negroes. The very next day, return to your true ways and kill, rob, and rape each other. Indeed, niggers hate niggers, too.

118. Become a contestant on AMERICAN IDOL and gain your short-lived fame. In time, the media will expose your deviant and criminal past.

119. Any negress booted off of AMERICAN IDOL due to her untalented, shrill voice will consequently bash and slander the show's judges in typical negro fashion, making a bigger ass of herself than she did in auditions. She should claim that she will make it to the top of the music world someday, and they will regret throwing her off the show. Wearing a blonde wig is a plus.

120. At black funerals, negresses will lose all control and fall all over everyone, and scream at the top of their lungs, "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH LAWD TAKEMETAKEMETAKEME LAWD PLEEEEEZE TAKE ME OOOOOOOOOHHH LAWD JEEEEZUS TAKE ME!!!!!" (This truly happens, I have witnessed it)

121. It is no secret that negroes love to commit insurance fraud of all kinds. Run out in the street to an oncoming vehicle and bump it as it passes. Fall over and act injured, and later sue the vehicle owner. Make sure your victim is white, negroes usually live below the poverty level, never have insurance, and usually drive off after hitting someone.
122. Negroes operating a motor vehicle should slam on the brakes purposely to cause an accident, and then act injured. Again, the victim should be white, and again, you will sue.

123. Negresses should wear maternity dresses and strap on a cut-open basketball half underneath as if to show pregnancy. Walk into the department store of choice and shoplift until no more items can be carried. Watch for cameras, employees, and security guards.

124. Eat at expensive resturaunts. Eat everything on the plate except for an extremely small chunk of food. Complain to the waiter that you now feel ill as a result of the food, and demand that they give you the meal for free. Threaten to call the health department and the NAACP.

125. Claim that white people smell like wet dogs, even though negroes smell like shit (literally, in some cases). Due to negro stupidity and ignorance, you do not realize that wiggers are not counted as white people- they go the extra mile to be black....this includes stench and sex with beasts (negroes).

126. Drink yourself into a drunken stupor and go to work driving a school bus, endangering childrens' and motorists' lives.

127. Negroes should stalk neighborhood parks and prey on children (preferably little white girls). Snatch one walking by your van and rape him/her at gunpoint or knifepoint. Tell them you'll kill their parents if they tell the police.

128. Hold all-black events, such as the NAACP Black Achievement Awards. When you find out about all-white events, cry racism and threaten a discrimination lawsuit. Demand that the hosts of these events publicly apologize to the negro community and donate to an all-black charity.

129. When a negress feels she made a mistake by having a child, it is acceptable for her to kill him, sell him for drugs, or abandon him at a shopping mall or random street corner. If the grandmother is alive, it is acceptable to burden her with the child while you disappear for years at a time.

130. Black postal workers should always deliver mail to the wrong addresses. If the home has a door mail slot, never push the mail completely through, instead leaving it hanging halfway out of the slot.

131. Join a mob of twenty to thirty negroes to randomly pick out one white person and attack him, and to stomp him to death for no reason. Today's politically correct laws ensure that you will not be charged with a hate crime.

132. Negroes should always pronounce their names to sound exotic. For instance, if a negress is named Jackie, she should introduce herself this way: "How yaw durrin, mah name is Jackaaaayyy", stressing the "ie" to sound like "ay".

133. When negroes' vehicles break down, they should push it down the street, backing up traffic for miles. Never push the car to the side of the road or call a tow truck.

134. Negresses must dress like the lowest of prostitutes to attract even the lowly negro male.

135. Brag about how much better life would be in Africa, even though you've never been there, and despite the fact that even African niggers look down on you.

136) When a nigger slaughters its mate, it is acceptable for the nigger to hack the carcass into pieces and grill the bodyparts on a barbeque pit in an attempt to avoid capture.

137) When a nigger is arrested, tried, and convicted of a murder, its family should never accept any wrongdoing on the nigger's part. They should make excuses for the niggers actions, such as "he be havin' a rough chilehood" or "Arongelo nebbah had a daddy". The shegroid mammy should deny everything in front of the news cameras, "cain't nahh muhfugga tells me mah Arongelo do dis to dat white devil, mah boy inn-o-cent! He a good chile!"

138) Whenever losing in an argument to a white person, niggers should always switch to the usual nigger insults and lies: "honkeys be smellin' like wet dog", "fucks you, hunkey", and of course, "yo momma". Internet niggers should post pornography images and the usual "muh dik" messages.

139) Niggers should covet the thug lifestyle. Act, look, and talk like a thug. When the police begin profiling the thug nigger, it should cry racism and police brutality.

140) Nigger 911 operators should never take calls seriously. They should always give them the typical nigger attitude and ebonics, and never send the police out to the scene. If questioned, the nigger should say that the call sounded like a prank call.

141) Niggers should get high and then call 911 to report a false emergency, taking police officers, paramedics, and firefighters away from real emergencies. When the niggers are arrested, they should cry racism.

142) Niggers always find God (or Allah) in the days before conviction for a crime. When finally being released from prison, they leave God and their Bible behind, opting to return to their niggerish ways of robbery, rape, and murder.

143) When niggers are arrested for assaulting or murdering someone, they should always lie and say, "he call me a nigger".

144) When nigger comedians are onstage exploiting niggerdom and TNB for comedic purposes, niggers should laugh and clap their hands loudly, rocking back and forth violently in their seats while emitting those annoying "KSSS SSSS SSSS SSSS" and "KEEK KEEK KEEK" sounds. When a white man says the same thing, niggers should become furious and cry racism. They should demand endless written and public apologies while threatening citywide riots and violence. Niggers should try to ruin the career of the white man in question.

145) Niggers should carjack people, and always murder the victim. When the nigger is questioned upon capture, it will be asked why it murdered the victim. The nigger should respond, "I needs a cah to git 'cross town, an I ain' hab no bus fare. Dis ho din't wanna gib up da wheels."
yo mama so skinny
Yo mama so skinny she inspires crack whores to diet.
run like the ashes
What do you call a bunch of Nazis running after Jews?

Temple Run
honda civic
There are 4 Jews in a Honda Civic what's the problem???

The Honda Civic fits 5
jupiter more like jewpiter am i right
what do you call12
What do you call a Bee who is confused?

To Bee or not to Bee :)
whats the difference5
Whats the difference between a black guy and a elevator? An elevator can raise a child.
Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? The bench can support a family.
asian jokes
What do you call a asian rapist? Rai-Ping-Yu
What do you call a asian Paralympian? Lim-Ping
why can't two asians have a white baby? Because two wong's don't make a white
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