submit your joke
SUBMIT YOUR JOKE:
Contact Us
Wish to contact us? you can do so here:
LOG IN SIGN UP
Actually I forgot my password...
Click here Got a joke? Share it!
menu Subscribe to our daily newsletter Signup Login Contact Us

We see you have an adblocker available, we get it, but please consider as ads are the only thing keeping us in the air

Racist Jokes

women`s bellybuttons
Why do women have bellybuttons?

That`s where you put the tarter sauce.
black boy bicycle
What do you call a little black boy with a bicycle?

THIEF !!
moby dick`s father
Who was Moby Dick`s father?
Poppa Boner
yo momma
Yo momma so old she had dinner with Jesus!
abo
What do you call a dead aborigial baby

Abortion
mcdonalds
Yo mama so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway.
cuff her underwear
Yo mama's so short, she has to cuff her underwear.
More racist jokes down here...
sock for a sleeping bag
Yo momma so short, she uses a sock for a sleeping bag
chicken nugget
Yo mama so short the only thing she could dunk was a chicken nugget
truck ran over
Yo mama so short, when a truck ran over her she still was alive
roll dice
Yo mama so short, she don't roll dice, she pushes them.
black fact
the people that has black skin are invisible in the night .That gives them profit for robbing the banks!
funny blonde joke
So a blind guy walks into a bar and asks the bar tender if he wants to hear a blonde joke? He immediately hears a huge voice from behind him who said "I want you to know that your bar tender is a blonde and so is the bouncer and so are those two guys over there. Are you sure you want to tell that joke?" He said "nah I don't want to have to explain it five fucking times"
not long enough
A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."
homework
Teacher: "Kids,what does the chicken give you?"
Student: "Meat!"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"
Student: "Bacon!"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
Student: "Homework!"
literal
The teacher asked Jimmy, "Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?" Jimmy replied crying, "Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, 'I am going to eat that p*ssy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'"
her side of the family
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
i like how youre thinking
A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"
be like mario
Do not be racist; be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!
whale
racist jokes - whale
Yo momma is so fat that when she went to the beach a whale swam up and sang, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me."
longer sentence
Q: Why did President Obama get two terms?
A: Because every black man gets a longer sentence.
tgif
A cowboy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks for a shot. Across the bar, a Mexican man is sitting and glaring at the cowboy. The cowboy takes the shot and slams the shot glass down on the counter, yelling, "TGIF!" The Mexican orders a shot, takes it, and slams his glass down, yelling, "SPIT!" The cowboy looks over at him and notices the Mexican guy is still staring at him. The cowboy once again orders a shot, slams it down, and yells again "TGIF!" Once again, the Mexican orders a shot, slams it down after consuming it, and yells out, "SPIT!" This goes on for a while, and the bartender stands puzzled and annoyed. Finally, the bartender asks the cowboy, "Just checking, but do you know what TGIF means?" and the cowboy replies, "Hell ya I know what it means, 'Thank God It's Friday!'" The bartender asks the Mexican guy, "Okay, so what does 'SPIT' mean?" and the Mexican replies, "Stupid Pendejo It's Thursday!"
velcro
How do you get the little black kids to stop jumping on the bed? Put Velcro on the ceiling. How do you get them down? Tell the Mexican kids it's a piñata.
a black pilot
What do you call a black pilot flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.
i got him with the door
There was a redneck who hit every black man he saw with his truck. One day he saw a priest walking down the road and thought, "For all the bad things I done, let me give this priest a ride." So he picked the priest up and they drove along. The redneck saw a black guy down the road and decided he would pretend to fall asleep and so the priest would think it was an accident. The redneck closed his eyes and heard a loud bang. "What happened?" he asked. "You missed him," the priest said, "but I got him with the door."
green pink and yellow
A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now." The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senor, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!" The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I'm going to make it hard for him and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use three english words in a sentence. The three words are 'green,' 'pink,' and 'yellow.'" The Mexican man thinks , then says, "Hmmm, okay. The phone, it went green, green, green. I pink it up and sez yellow?"
calling local
There were three guys in Hell - Iranian, American, and a Chinese man. They asked Satan to let them call their family. The American called and talked for 10 minutes. He payed $1,000. The Chinaman called and talked for 15 minutes. He payed $2,000. The Iranian talked for an hour and only paid $10. The other men complained and Satan responded, "A call from Hell to Hell is local."
get down with it1
Why did so many black men get killed in Vietnam? When the generals would yell, "Get down!" they would all start dancing.
the black keys
My uncle was a racist piano player, all his work sounded awful because he skipped all the black keys.
never got the chance
78% of black men like sex in the shower. The other 22% haven't been to prison yet.
Subscribe to get 10 random jokes to your email daily